10. Your annual breast exam is done at Hooters.
9. Directions to your doctor's office include "Take a Left when you enter the trailer park"
8. The tongue depressors taste faintly of Fudgesicles
7. The only Proctologist in the plan is "Gus" from Roto-Rooter
6. The only item listed under Preventative Care Coverage is "An Apple A Day"
5. Your primary care physician is wearing the pants you gave to the Goodwill last month
4. The patient is responsible for 200% of out-of-network charges "is not a typographical error"
3. The only expense covered 100% is "Enbalming "
2. Your Prozac comes in different colors with little "M"s on them
AND THE NUMBER #1 sign you are covered by obamas government health care...
1. You ask for Viagra and they give you a popsicle stick and duct tape!
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